Sunday, July 18, 2010

Every Night

He watched her waltzing entry to the room, the sway of her hips making the black silk covering them whisper of forbidden secrets. He knew the scent of her that wafted across the space to envelope him in the familiar … and the unknown … overwhelming his senses. The twinkle in her eye as she paused to charm the men in her path tripped his heartbeat into a faster tempo, forcing him to focus on the conversation with the client across from him. He saw her graceful tapered fingers rest briefly on the sleeve of the chairman’s tailored black jacket, taking his imagination to places best visited in private as he thought of other places those hands had wandered. And still he smiled and chatted and schmoozed and played his part to perfection.

After all, she’d be going home with him … just like she had every night for the last twenty years.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Meantime Living

Borrowed words today...

"Meantimers don't live in the here and now, they live in the there and now. 'In the meantime' is a defense. It's a way of hedging your bets and avoiding the very risks that often lead to personal growth. 'In the meantime' people almost always have big plans: to get in shape, to sign up for some classes, to quit their jobs, to start that novel, to change their lives. The present is trivialized; it's the future that matters. All of the things they're not happy with are just for now. These same meantimers believe they hold the reins of their destiny by keeping a full calender.

But more than anything, 'in the meantime' living is is motivated by fear. It may be the fear of dealing with an unhealthy relationship, the fear of being alone... but it's fear nonetheless. And that fear is preventing you from taking a needed step toward empowerment. Worse, that fear is keeping you in a state of limbo, and it's lowering the standards you're willing to tolerate.

Sometimes the 'there and now' isn't about the future, it's about the past and not being able to move on.

Imagine going through years of your life with the gut feeling that none of it really matters yet, that it will start at some point in the future, and that the present doesn't really count. Does this feeling seem familiar? Have you ever told yourself that everything will ultimately fall into place once you (fill in the blank, e.g., publish that book, lose ten pounds, meet a great person, get that promotion, buy that house, and so on?)? And who wouldn't want to convince themselves that at least some of the effort was worthwhile, that all of the energy you expended on whatever really did matter?

We can't live every moment like it's our last because doing so would make every moment too serious. So we do the opposite. We live lightly and frivolously, squandering our moments."

- Ian Kerner

Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Moment

A wise person once said that we often don’t recognize the most important things at the moment they happen. That’s the way it was. Weeks later, when she was struck with the realization of what had transpired, the truth of it took her breath away. On that rainy Thursday afternoon, the moment after he walked away, she knew it was true. He had carried her heart for the longest time and she hadn’t even noticed. Only now, when it lay bruised and bleeding at her feet, did she realize she had given it and all the love it held away.